Dean Whitbread 2020
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As previously covered four years ago Queen Elizabeth 2, German monarch of England, has once again been up to her nuptial tricks, this time cleverly blaming her high-octane, expensive sexual antics on a “respectable couple with respectable jobs” who for some unknown reason found themselves making love on Her Majesty’s lawns at Windsor.
Research now reveals that aircraft returning from Mexico on the Heathrow flightpath were diverted over Windsor immediately prior to this apparently uncharacteristic breach of public decency. As musical artist Prince has recently stated, the chem trails expelled by aeroplanes are responsible for bad behaviour everywhere. Only politicians, the military and the upper echelons of Royalty have the power to divert air traffic. Ergo, this unfortunate couple will forever be tarred with the brush of outlandish erotic behaviour while the real culprits lurk in their private, heavily guarded quarters.
With the imminent return of French rule and the renaissance of the British Republic, serious analysts project a return to normality shortly after the next general election.