Dean Whitbread 2020
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After removing the original list, I came up with this, which I think is a lot better.
1. My body is made of porcelain
2. My legs are two inches long
3. There are small lines appearing on my fingers
4. I’m worried that I may be cracking up
5. If I fall over, I might smash
6. I do have a supply of glue
7. But who will pick up the pieces?
8. My real name is Mr Wedgwood
9. I live in a cupboard
10. A lot of people can’t spell cupboard
11. I’d like to hang out but what happens if the hook is loose?
12. Rubber floors are always a good option
13. I’m glad I’m not plastic
14. I can take the heat and I like the kitchen
15. My mother is a teapot
16. My father is a Tibetan nose flute
17. I invented Star Trek
18. I can run for a week without food
19. There are too many pale imitations
20. Once I was in a lift with some other people. They didn’t know who I was.
21. We think, don’t we, that Destiny is a sure bet for the 11.30 at Redcar
22. Mention West Ham and I think of bacon
23. There are only two left in the entire world
24. Would that were true.
25. Wood, that were true.