Visible Pink Unicorn

I was going to write a piece entitled, Brim Full Of Asha On My 45th but although the story needs telling and it will be good to tell, I am going to leave that tale of three restaurants to another day. Instead I wish to report on the day after my 45th birthday that a sign has appeared in the place I live, a symbol of unmistakable portent, albeit unlikely in it’s soft fluffy naivety: a pink unicorn.

This is a pregnant and strange symbol to appear on my birthday. It’s still now in the place I first saw it, halfway up the communal stairwell. It is in pretty good shape for an abandoned toy.

Research shows me that the most common Pink Unicorn is invisible, and has been dubbed the IPU – “The Invisible Pink Unicorn is a fictional female deity in the form of a unicorn. Her Holy-Hoofness is a goddess invented at the usenet discussion group alt.atheism as an alternative to other parody deities like Church of the SubGenius, Eris of the Discordianism, and the Flying Spaghetti Monster. It has been specifically designed not to directly offend people who have theistic beliefs.”

You can wear a pendant to non-offensively stand up for your lack of belief – how considerate.

But here’s the rub: this unicorn is clearly visible, having manifested to me as a child’s rocking horse. It is clearly meant for me – after all, it appeared on my birthday. What gift does heaven hold for me? What innocently rocking ride? What message from the stars, and beyond?

Since the IPU is a symbol of atheism, then the appearance of this very visible pink unicorn must be theist. I think that I am being told: believe in the logically unbelievable, including God, who has found a way to communicate with me, cutting through my urban cynicism and my mundane preoccupations with sex and death and taxes, by putting a visible, pink, fluffy unicorn directly in my path.

The last thing I expected on my birthday was a message from God, telling me to disbelieve atheists.

visible pink unicorn atheism belief