Dean Whitbread 2020
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Well, we made it. Here we are, unscathed, we resisted the hype, forswore consumer love, and now it’s time to reveal our secret weapon, our magical avian protector, the water-born prophylactic of myth who has accompanied us through the past month leading up to this dread day. The Deadly Duckling, our very own anti-Cupid talisman will be about tonight, scouting for cherubs and bringing them down in a hail of lead, Al Capone-style, protecting the innocent, saving hearts from being broken. Don’t be fooled by the cute exterior – this is merely a clever yellow camouflage to enable effortless entry into those candlelit haunts, bars, restaurants, dancehalls and diners where the susceptible – that’s YOU and ME and ALL OF US – remain unaware of the evil cherub’s proximity. Yes there will be arrows tonight – but there will also be the ratatatatatat! of reality knocking on the window, locking the bathroom door, and insisting that dreams and illusions stay right where we want them – in the safe world of glossy magazines and Mills and Boon pulp fiction and Hollywood trash and TV mayhem. Meanwhile… here’s the internet date profile we created for HB:
…. which seems to be working so far. He he he he! and on a Monday too. If, after all this preparation and Valentine’s Day inoculation, the stars tonight seem suddenly to twinkle extra sharp, and you catch your breath without quite yet knowing why, your heart skips a beat and then races, your pupils dilate, and your ears sense an almost-inaudible flutter of wings as you acknowledge a sudden pain, which is yet unlike pain, inasmuch as the world it takes you to forgives and allows all injury for the sake of love, take yourself in hand, wash your face with cold water, have a shot of cognac, and run your mind around this little ditty:
From Agape Love: A Tradition Found in Eight World Religions by Sir John Templeton, © 1999 UPDATE: My Valentine’s Day Moblog Image (see right column) has just been selected as Editor’s Pick at TEXTAMERICA.COM which should help to bring Cupid within firing range…. |
This thing has 3 Comments
haha ROTFL !!! could you be funnier? some imagination you have! … and have a wonderful (V) day anyway :))
so it was the deadly duckling gnawing at my toes last night. why didn’t you tell me of this sooner?
congrats on the picture pic. seems i saw another pic of yours there as i went to check out your glory. a blue faced devil that caught my eye some time ago. perhaps not, the memory is fragile.