![](\"http:\/\/funk.co.uk\/blogpix\/olive_stone.jpg\"\/)
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"So there were these two kids sitting on a bench, and one of them was explaining olives to the other, while the other was proving difficult to convince.<\/p>\n
“Olives,” said the bigger kid, “they are Just Like Nuts. You Don’t Eat All The Nut. You Only Eat the Soft Bit IN THE MIDDLE.”<\/p>\n
“OK,” said the smaller kid, dubiously.<\/p>\n
“See, the bit in the middle is tasty, yeah?”<\/p>\n
“Sort of.”<\/p>\n
“It IS! It’s nice. But, it’s like nuts.”<\/p>\n
“It’s easy when they’re in bags.” The small kid’s plaintive voice stood for a wide world of advertised convenience. The big kid was using a sledgehammer to crack the nut of the smaller kid’s ignorance.<\/p>\n
“Yes, but, they are nicer when you get them fresh, innit? Like Christmas,” said the big kid with inexorable logic, and he stretched out his legs, and gazed about them, satisfied that the argument was well and truly won.<\/p>\n
There was a pause. Then the small kid said,<\/p>\n
“But, you said this before, yeah, and I still can’t swallow it.”<\/p>\n
Flabbergasted and exasperated, the bigger kid said,<\/p>\n
“Well, why not? Just chew it up.”<\/p>\n
“I’ve tried,” said the smaller kid, “but it’s too hard. Look.”<\/p>\n
He pulled a small, dark, oval object from the recesses of his jeans and held it up between thumb and grubby forefinger.<\/p>\n
“See? How am I supposed to eat that?”<\/p>\n
Dawning was a moment of gentleness, as the bigger boy realised his mistake. Beaming and generous, he lowered his voice, and taking the olive stone, said proudly and confidentially, with a gastronomic flourish,<\/p>\n
“Ah, you see, that’s where you’ve got it wrong, mate. Nuts, you chuck the outside, eat the inside. Olives, you eat the outside, chuck the inside.”<\/p>\n
A deft flick of his strong wrist sent the inedible olive stone flying across the grass, where it was immediately siezed upon by a couple of flapping, pecking pigeons, who took some time to discover that fact. A silent air of deep calm descended on the boys, as the far distant Mediterranean sea lapped at their feet, and sunlight broke through, warming their brows.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
So there were these two kids sitting on a bench, and one of them was explaining olives to the other, while the other was proving difficult to convince. “Olives,” said the bigger kid, “they are Just Like Nuts. You Don’t Eat All The Nut. You Only Eat the Soft Bit IN THE MIDDLE.” “OK,” said […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":126,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[780],"class_list":["post-798","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funky-original","tag-funky-original"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/126"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=798"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/798\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=798"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=798"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=798"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}