{"id":384,"date":"2005-11-08T17:20:00","date_gmt":"2005-11-08T17:20:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/2005\/11\/punctured-and-bruised\/"},"modified":"2005-11-08T17:20:00","modified_gmt":"2005-11-08T17:20:00","slug":"punctured-and-bruised","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/2005\/11\/punctured-and-bruised\/","title":{"rendered":"Punctured and Bruised"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/funk.co.uk\/blogpix\/blood_test_arm.jpg\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Yesterday, I cycled to the hospital and back, all the way up and down the Holloway Road. I had to fast from 10.30pm Sunday night. It was very odd being awake and in a public space <i>without having drunk tea<\/i>. The hospital took five phials of type A+ blood marked with brightly coloured labels. The doctor was nice &#8211; young, female and Polish &#8211; so I produced the few Polish words I knew to take my mind off the procedure. My nose was at her shapely bum height as I sat on the chair at 9.05 a.m. and uttered the greeting,<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Gin Dobri.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Oh, you speak Polish?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;No. I just fancy you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>She dazzled me in the morning light with a beautiful and natural smile.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;That&#8217;s nice.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Czaesht.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;You know it!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;No, I just have half a dozen friends of Polish origin, all of whom also fancy you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;In your dreams, Englishman.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Today, I have a small bruise.<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/funk.co.uk\/blogpix\/puncture_bruise.jpg\" \/><\/p>\n<p>They will have the results on Thursday, and I go back to the doctor&#8217;s surgery on Friday to check my blood pressure, and to get the biochemical lowdown.<\/p>\n<p>The chesty cold I&#8217;ve had is leaving me. I ran a couple of miles this morning. The leg rash is going. My concentration is OK. I&#8217;m still thinking, surely I cannot be <i>that<\/i> ill, or I would feel much worse&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Yesterday, I cycled to the hospital and back, all the way up and down the Holloway Road. I had to fast from 10.30pm Sunday night. It was very odd being awake and in a public space without having drunk tea. The hospital took five phials of type A+ blood marked with brightly coloured labels. The [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":126,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[780],"class_list":["post-384","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funky-original","tag-funky-original"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/384","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/126"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=384"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/384\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=384"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=384"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theothersideofeverything.com\/flip\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=384"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}