I have a head cold, which started last week when I couldn’t afford to get it. So instead I had a day of sore throat and prickly heat, then work made it go away. Now work is almost done (that work anyway) so it’s come back to get me. Funny how the system supresses illness when other matters like survival, financial or otherwise, dictate.
Coughing and spluttering, uncontrollable sneezing, eyes puffy and red, legs and back aching. Imagine the effects of the cold upon me when this is my normal state of being…
Some people seem to have a humour bypass when they get sick as if they must be serious about it or they will permanently have to endure the symptoms. I just get vague.. forget things..
I just get vague…
… forget things…
… and sometimes I can’t quite remember what I was saying or doing. Like getting into the shower and wondering why I am standing there shivering. Ah yes, hot water. Supposed to be good for you. I decide to do no-brainer activity to try to make use of my downtime, which is a foolish strategy, since my forgetfulness means I put a hot white wash on then find the lost black sock (AT LAST!), stop the cycle and carefully add it to the whites. All sense of appetite is skewed. I am ravenous. I eat 2 mouthfuls and then I am full. Constantly thirsty though swallowing hurts. Can taste food only in the few sacred moments when a nostril is clear. Shopping for food is useless as I can only think of porridge and tinned spaghetti, the comfort food from my childhood. Headaches come and go like weather fronts depending upon the state of my sinuses, throbbing away like the bass bins at a rave I live next door to but can never attend.
Then there’s the way a cold shows you how you are going to be when you are OLD. The bags, lines, creases and crinkles under watery eyes, the stooped gait, the hobble, the dry papery lips, the stubble (men and women)… the protest at all effort, however feeble, however pointless.
Colds are good for us. They tell us we are mortal. They help us to grow closer to God. This too is an effect of the virus, the plaintive calling for extra-terrestrial, metaphysical help, oh god oh god oh god i feel shit please i’ll do anything. God forbid we should get really sick, or we’ll be turning to the other fella. The desperation to escape as the virus has it’s moment of victory and bends us to it’s will, like Hitler bestriding Europe, like Stalin’s iron grip on the East, erasing all that does not comply with it’s purpose of self-perpetuation.
AAAAAAA-TISHOOOOOOO !!!! Bless me.